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An Abandoned Building

Descriptive Writing

Intermediate

20 minutes

Kent

FSCE

Independent

The Prompt

“Describe an abandoned building. Create a strong sense of atmosphere.”

Planning Hints

4 tips to help you plan your response

What kind of building — a house, a school, a factory, a hospital?

Focus on the contrast between what it was and what it is now.

Use sound (or the absence of sound) to build atmosphere.

Small details are powerful: a shoe left behind, a clock stopped at 3:15, peeling wallpaper.

Starter Sentences

Suggested opening lines to get you started

“The building didn't look abandoned at first. It looked like it was holding its breath.”

“Nature had already begun its slow invasion.”

“The door hung open, not as an invitation but as a surrender.”

Key Techniques to Demonstrate

Techniques the examiner will be looking for in your response

Annotated Model Answer

A high-quality example response with techniques highlighted

The building didn't look abandoned at first. It looked like it was holding its breath. It had been a school once — you could tell by the low windows, the wide corridors, the hooks along the wall at exactly the height a six-year-old could reach. A sign above the entrance still read "St. Catherine's Primary" in faded blue letters, though the "P" had fallen, leaving a rectangular ghost on the brickwork. Inside, silence had taken up residence. Not the comfortable silence of an empty room, but the deep, weighted silence of a place where noise once lived and had been asked to leave. My footsteps echoed on the linoleum floor, and each echo seemed to linger a beat too long, as if the building was listening. The classrooms were a strange museum of interrupted life. In one, chairs still circled a table, a jar of dried-out paint brushes standing guard at the centre. In another, a world map hung on the wall, its edges curling inward like a scroll, the Soviet Union still intact in faded pink. A child's coat — red, with a broken zip — hung from a peg near the door. It had been there so long that dust had gathered in its folds like grey snow. Nature had found its way in. Ivy climbed the staircase bannister, weaving between the railings with patient determination. A bird's nest sat in the light fitting of the main hall, perfectly built, as though the sparrows considered this the finest real estate in the neighbourhood. Moss crept across the windowsills, soft and green and utterly indifferent to the "Keep Out" sign that dangled from the gate. Light filtered through the dirty windows in pale, dusty shafts, turning the corridor into something that felt almost sacred — a cathedral of chalk dust and forgotten laughter. I stood in the doorway and thought about all the children who had once run through these halls, their voices filling every corner. The building remembered them. I was certain of it.

Hover or tap the highlighted phrases to see the technique and explanation

Techniques Used in This Answer

Personification (x3)

Metaphor (x3)

Simile

Ready to Write?

Practice this prompt under timed conditions, just like the real exam. You have 20 minutes.

Planning Templates

Suitable for descriptive writing

4-Paragraph Plan (CSSE Style)

A focused structure for shorter writing tasks (15-20 minutes). Ideal for CSSE where you only write 2 compulsory paragraphs, but this plan gives you 4 strong ones if time allows.

4 steps|2-3 minutes